Just build it again

Last night, after a busy weekend of cleaning our garage and spending the first family day we've had in months, we sat down to watch a movie after we tucked Max into bed.  The movie was called "Machine Gun Preacher".  Intense movie.  It's about a drug addict who turns to God and then goes to Africa.  He witnesses the atrocities of war and he deicides to help the children of the Sudan by building an orphanage.  He builds it dangerously close to the violence and when they burn his orphanage down, he is crushed.  When he is at his lowest and ready to give up hope he calls his wife and tells her he can't do it anymore.  His wife tells him to quit crying and build it again.  Just build it again.  


We complain so much about our struggles in life, when some of us (myself included) have no idea what the word struggle really means.  


Today I woke up and headed to the gym, ready to put my work in for another day.  As I rode the bike, I listened to a song I hadn't heard before.  It reminded me of the man they based this movie on.  He wasn't perfect, far from it.  He sometimes did whatever it took to forward his mission.  Sometimes I feel like I go about it all wrong.  I want so bad for people to CARE about the things I care about, but they certainly won't care if I am bashing them over the head with it.  


In the Sudan and Uganda, children have been forced to become soldiers, murder their families, lose their innocence. All over the world, there are kids dying of hunger and disease, without the opportunity for an education.   I think of the way I used to check every fifteen minutes when Max was sleeping, to see if he was still breathing, and then how I would stand there just watching him breathe, feeling such peace knowing he was safe.  


So I am running, biking, swimming my ass off until I raise this money.  We are going to build this school.  


Here's the update $550 raised...$750 to go! 


Go to the donate button if you want to help me reach my goal.




The song I listened to this morning:


I can't promise you that I won't let you down
And I
I can't promise you that I will be the only one around
When your hope falls down
But we're young
Open flowers in the windy fields of this war-torn world
And love
This city breathes the plague of loving things more than their creators

I ran away
I could not take the burden of both me and you
It was too fast
Casting love on me as if it were a spell I could not break
When it was a promise I could not make

But what if I was wrong?
What if I was wrong?
Oh, what if I was wrong?

But hold on to what you believe in the light
When the darkness has robbed you of all your sight
And Oh hold on to what you believe in the light
When the darkness has robbed you of all your sight

And now this land
Means less and less to me without you breathing through its trees
At every turn
The water runs away from me and the halo disappears
I'm not whole when you're not near

So what if I was wrong?
What if I was wrong?
Oh, what if I was wrong?

But hold on to what you believe in the light
When the darkness has robbed you of all your sight
And Oh hold on to what you believe in the light
When the darkness has robbed you of all your sight

Hold on to what you believed in the light 



-Mumford and Sons