My mother has been bothering me for years to write a blog. Every year I have the same answer… “What would I have to say that people would want to read?” I tell her when I have an answer for that question, I will write a blog. I seriously don’t know how people have time to write them. I don’t even have time to take a shower. Literally. It’s a problem. I don’t know how all these women out there write blogs. Not only are they writing blogs, they are writing blogs about all the crafts and food they make. How are they finding time for that? And most of them have more than one child. I only have one, and I need a shower, badly.
Now, I have something to write about. It’s been a long time coming and I stay up at nights thinking about it. I have been waiting for the perfect time, and I realized, there is no perfect time. I have to stop wasting time and do it …now. Four years ago, I went to Africa. Four years ago I made promises to people there that I would not forget them, that I would tell their stories. Four years ago. What have I done in four years?
My mom thought of the title “Before and Africa” and I actually love it. There are a lot of things my mom and I agree on, but usually when she has an idea “for” me, I politely turn her down. But this title struck a chord in me. I thought about all the blogs out there about style and fashion and craftiness and I thought about how my blog would probably be the antithesis of that. Maybe I do always buy the same long sleeved shirts at the GAP every three years when the old ones get holes in them. Maybe I do still have the same tennis shoes I bought for 30 bucks 6 years ago. Maybe I do only get my hair cut once a year. Maybe I am in desperate need of a style makeover, but I think this blog is more of a before and after of my soul. My soul before and now my soul (after) Africa…
So thanks mom, for the title and for recognizing there has been a change in me and that even though I have a hard time finding the words, it’s time to start trying.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Birthday Boy


One year ago tomorrow we were placed on a list of families approved to remove their children from the DRC.  It was the day after Moses’ 3rd birthday.  

Last night I got an email from another DRC mom, who told me to check our Lifesong donations.  We have decided not to continue to ask for money from friends and family for our adoption.  We had committed to asking for a certain amount and then once we raised that we would come up with the rest on our own …or just pray that God would provide.  Somehow…every time we need funds …God provides.  We have been financially struggling with the adoption process since our agency was  debarred in December.  We had to find a new agency and with that came many more fees.   

Out of the blue one day, a mom we met in the DRC said there was another DRC mom who knew someone looking to donate to a family still waiting to get their children out of DRC. Well there aren’t very many of us left so she told them about us.  Last night, that donation went through.  We can now pay for our new agency and HOPEFULLY a ticket to the DRC.  I got so excited last night.  I was like “TONY this must be a sign, last year at this time we were put on the list…and it’s Moses’ birthday  and….” Then I had to reign it in because I felt the lump rise and the tears coming.  You see I have had this feeling of excitement and hope before…and been let down.   So instead of getting ahead of myself, I am praising God for my sweet four year old boy today.  I wish I could eat cupcakes with him and watch him open his gifts, but I have to live another milestone without him here.  I am grieving and rejoicing today.  Letting myself watch the videos and look at the pictures today.   I rejoice in the possibility of bringing him home this year,  I grieve in the possibility that we won’t.  I rejoice in his four years of life.  I grieve that I have missed out on those years.  

Happy Birthday Love.  We miss you. 












Moses Birthday from Jennifer Schmid on Vimeo.

2 comments:

  1. Happy 4th birthday Mosey!❤️❤️

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  2. Praying for you, Jen! Your story and vulnerability is so beautiful- I pray that Moses will be united with his family soon <3

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